Love and Jesus

HEyo! I should go to bed soon, but I haven’t written in so long I know I need to. It seems last time I took a sabbatical people forgot to get back into it, so I’ll try to be consistent so you can make me part of your regular habit! :)
The other day when Paige and I were watching 28 Days Later (which I bought yea!) she said a little piece of gold: “It would suck to be in the stair-car during the Zombie invasion… SO many hop-ons.” Isn’t that GOLD? Ah! If you don’t know what this a a reference go to your local movie place (preferably Hastings) and get yourself some Arrested Development (for sale or rent)! ASAP! Good times.
Today Paige and I went to our first class and then went and saw He’s just not that into you at the dinner and a movie place called Jam Club or something equally silly. IT was nice. We haven’t gone out for a movie in a relatively long time and it is a very soothing process for me. :) Then I went to Church. But I was WAY early and so I did some wandering first. I had never gone to the Tuesday service at the Ozerki church before. I didn’t even really know what time it started or what it would be like… But on Saturday (or maybe it was Sunday) Kristina said that she wanted to go to church more and asked me about church services (it isn’t like she goes infrequently though… She goes like 3 or 4 times a week). I knew there was a service on Tuesday but I didn’t know anything else about it. So we decided we’d go together. But when I got to Ozerki (like 30 minutes early) I called her and she said … well I don’t know but I think she wasn’t feeling to hot so she wasn’t coming. I went. I thought it started at 18:00 but there was like no one there so I sat in the most invisible spot I could find (it was behind a column) and just prayed and enjoyed God and read the Bible. I had hoped to go by unnoticed, but at like 18:30 Nicolai saw me and came over and asked me to help him with his English and he read the beginning verses of John to me in English. He said he had been in Finland the day before (which blew my mind because I saw him both on Sunday and Monday… I guess that was a quick trip) and they’d taught him some English. He has pretty good at what he had learned and he translated it into Russian to prove he understood. Cool, cool. Then I prayed for another 30 minutes. Then the service started at 19:00 and I heard laughing behind me only to see the rest of the brothers there just realizing I was in front of them. I guess I am not very good at being inconspicuous. The service was nice. Today is a Holiday and as far as I can tell it celebrates Jesus’s conception…. I don’t really know… but we read Luke 1:26-56 and the young people’s choir sang wonderful songs perfectly relating to the verses. One of my lampposts: Luke 1:45 is in there and it was so good to here it. I also am really engrossed with the fast that I am a slave to the Lord and Mary calls herself the Lord’s slave in verse 38 so I learned the correct female word for slave and wrote “Lord’s slave on my wrist.” I didn’t think much of it at the time although I thought I heard the men make some noise behind me but when the service was over Pyotr made me show him my wrist and laughed. I guess they were watching me like the whole time. I should’ve known and I was kind of conscious of it but I tried to shut it out. The service was swell and GOD IS GREAT. Kristina called me later to ask about it and asked if she could load me a DVD. I LOVE HER.
I had some down days emotionally pretty much from Thursday night until half way through the night service on Sunday. Various people commented on it. I guess I am usually so overly jubilant here I can’t even pass by without dancing or laughing randomly without people noticing. Saturday night at “choir” practice (there it 4 of us) Nicolai was like “Do you know Jesus Loves you?” and I said yes and then he pretty much told me that I should be happy then. It was sweet. He later commented on my “depression. ” that same night during bible study Aleksey twice told me not to cry. I thought I was passing for moderate emotion… but I guess not. Later Kristina was kinda asking what was up and she got the whole lot of it including tears and everything while she and I were heading home together and waiting at the bus stop. She is so sweet and compassionate. I think she is very wise too, but I can’t say I understand all of her advice unfortunately. I LOVE HER. It was extra sucky to be sulky because when I went to rehab on Friday night it was just me and the Ukrainian dude and so he played a recording of a sermon he had while we were waiting for potential intakes. The Sermon was given by an American Southern Baptist from Billy Graham’s group or something and so it was in English with Ukrainian translation. It was about joy. Haha, I guess I didn’t get the hint until Sunday when I finally asked God what was wrong with me. He said it was guilt and when I asked if it was righteous guilt HE said no. I do that sometimes. Hold on to guilt for things God has already forgiven myself and my massive guilt trips are crippling. I surrendered it to HIM and he took it from me and filled me wonderous joy! I’ve pretty much been walking on air since then :) Praise God.
Monday was SO GOOD I cannot even begin to describe it! TRULY JUST KNOW IT WAS AN INCREDIBLE BLESSING FROM GOD! I grew so much closer to Kristina and God answered the prayers I prayed for throughout the day with HUGE AFFIRMATIVES and he enabled me to finish the translations for the websites. And HE was AMAZIGN AND WODNERFUL! And AH!! Beyond description! I dunno, it you want more details make me call you so I can tell you, cause I can’t write it all.
Bu speaking of the website, I HIGHLY encourage you all to check it out!!! PLEASE!!! Valery has been really beefing it up lately and plus there is a little testimonial of mine on there and a bunch of the stuff was translated by me. :) CHECK IT OUT!!!
Go to:
narcostop.org
Click on the British flag for English and look around. That is the organization I am with a lot and volunteer at. I very highly endorse the group so if the Lord compels you to contact them or donate or if you plan on going to Russia and want to visit them, DO IT! They are way cool and it is wonderful to see the way God works through their program.